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1) hank jennings beating up leo johnson "told you to mind the store / not to open up your own franchise". why? look at what leo wants: red corvette, house (unfinished) (at the lake), wife (photograph on top of tv-set) (and chopping wood). those are the things he wants and those are the usual things an usual evil kid wants (you know what i mean with the last term from own experience, do you? i mean like: those kids back in school, back when you were very young, wasn't that what they "wanted"?). and leo wants that. in order to reach his goals he found out that copying a fallen angel (hank) would be an easy way. so he looks like a fallen angel on the surface, but, in the end, remains an usual petty criminal (meaning wanton, evil, abusive, careless, ever-imitating child). and because that is so hard to decipher, especially when you stick to faith and benevolent interpretation ... that's why he shoots me (waldo the bird that is). (and what's that anyway? illegal u-turn? drunk and disorderly? (could be: ordered a beer, keeper said: no, he said yes, keeper said no, he said yes and then threw a bottle someplace and refused to leave: what's that?) aggravated assault was: charges dropped (that means tested but no evidence or evidence against his culpability). that's nothing.) 1.1) "back then he was one of the best of us" ... no, sheriff truman. back then he was THE BEST of us and not of us, far out, far beyond from us. 2) ben horne is someone who habitually steals the language of someone else, especially jerry horne's. it must have been like: jerry always having the thoughts, having new ideas, in order to make some kind of (interim) peace with ben, but the sec he uttered his thoughts was the sec ben stole his words, uttered them himself all the time, without the meaning jerry tried to convey. at first they were friends, more or less, with jerry clearly being the slave (what were those terms of s/m again?), with jerry trying to convert their so-called friendship into a friendship (real friendship), but it failed and failed and failed. and now (tp), it's like: jerry is not trying to become friends with ben any longer, he would just be satisfied if he could manage to shove ben to the edge of cracking, of nervous breakdown and then a bit further, so frustrated is he with his constant failure of turning ben into a human being. so, now, i'm clearly on jerry's side, denying every single right of benjamin horne. it really hurts to think of my former hate against jerry because of that aftermath of "general lee's a-coming / i like your sword" (meaning: "there could be some advantages gained from leaving him ... insane"). and then that audrey comes along. once ben is solved, more or less self-inflicted, that damned audrey pops up and a threat perhaps more dangerous is at charge. UNBELIEVABLE! poor jerry! "holding it in a phone booth!?" but now i totally forgot that "WHAT'S THAT BLACKY!?"-scene. well, perhaps later. [a silver mount zion - broken chords can sing a little] 2.1) i'll type that in last because it's most ridiculous. after i've typed everything else down ... and it's so ridiculous ... no, i can't type that in. just one excerpt: "cold cold cold we don't like it here. and then bimbo and zimbo were down there, where it was warmer and they came back again and said "o it's fun down there, so warm, so much cattle, so much wealth, real houses and stuff". and then abel came along and yelled "why don't you motherfucking motherfuckers go down there, slit their throats and live in their houses like you do all the time!?!?!" and what happened: yes. a change in public discourse set in, a relevant change set in and they began to constantly talk about the things suggested by abel while abel was forgot and killed himself in despair over what he evoked. the next abel gave them a plan (weapons, training, man through steel), the next wrote their songs, the next yelled "now it's ..." yes. the only reason to find a small, bordered, not fully valiant excuse for leland. we are all icelanders! attacked by the cross, cowardly they came! man-o-man!
3) there's this blooper or how it's called, with coop infilitrating one-eyed-jack's and talking to jacques, where coop says: "i'm the bank". well, of course, jacques knows, as a brother of the bank (jean renault) that this must be untrue. and then this jean renault with that lovable accent and this very remarkable line "you get oneeyedjacks, i get cooper, evrybody happy" has his frenzy with killing coop. like it was something of: everyday situation: YOU (yes, i mean you), thinking of yrself as a good person (and you are) (no, you are not) (don't care, just talking to some idiots), talking with a bad person, don't know how to make your point and then, exaggerated begin to talk about the good people ruling and controlling everything and that evil persons in the end would stand no chance. evil person who listens now is evil person, that means: nervous breakdown, in the end evil, i mean in the beginning evil (consciously, more or less), but then: nervous breakdown, blind habit, still evil (effect, outcome), but no intent left (because of nervous breakdown). and then he takes that exaggerated stuff (fbi, cia, whatever secret service or political organizations you want to put in there, just do it, as a non-surpassable might that controls everything) and HE REALLY TAKES IT as if his own (criminal) actions could be derived from secret service or whatever. really believes it (nervous breakdown, ya know, hasn't to be coherent, what i write here). 4) eraserhead: parents (no, henry x is not the hero of the story). elephant man: brilliant 2sided thing, to hook them: coops and lelands feel like that. star wars turned down (just not my vision, beautiful statement). dune: phantasy of a political prophet, a political leader (with dino de laurentiis). didn't like it anyway, had no final cut, wasn't even a commercial success. but: could do blue velvet "all my friends are gone", student with dead father returning home. another take on parents (hopper, rosselini (i guess he laughed because he knew how he sat there and drew that scene (it's a meditation on the meaning of the word motherfucker) and suddenly he was there with dennis hopper (first famous person which's death affected me (was sad) (really)) and isabella rosselini and with all those expensive things and all those guys and the lighting and the set and the surrounding and it became surreal. is that why dl laughed?). then tp: reprise of youth of child of parents (eraserhead, blue velvet). main topic mapped out: laura palmer, why is she dead (careless, self-destructive robot)? ends with coop's stay in black lodge, wah as a stylized, adoring version of the fall of man (adam eve) (in other dl-movies they're phantoms, in wah they're real) (of course they're always "real", but in wah the fact that they're controlled and subordained by / to lies fells flat), like it may take place in purgatory (stone to bread). haven't ever seen industrial symphony, have only seen the ending of on the air (beautiful) (yeah, you're right, i'm imitating dl with "beautiful" as a stand-alone statement, that's true). lh, tp season 3 imo. straight story, something about briggsy (wisdom that comes with age; always dangerous, saying: wisdom only may come with age, there's no other way (untrue statement that is)). [a silver mount zion - movie (never made)] then those women-films, md and ie. have kind of an aversion against md, since it was the first dl-movie i watched over and over and over and blabla. 2003, one month, endlessly. haven't watched it that often since then. also think it's the most popular dl-movie, so why bother. perhaps later (no, won't be). ie. possibility of self-redemption of a female, resembling attitudes of exoteric religion (as if dichotomy of eso-exo wouldn't be against the very core of monotheism). like a redemption that is 75% valiant, but lacks understanding of holy men (constant bashing of zölibatäre typen). no understanding of necessity of monastic lifestyle (swearword?). nice trait but constantly bashing at those who are 100% holy and sacrifice all their lifes and not just their free-time. [mogwai - i love you, i'm going to blow up your school] 5) did forget what i wanted to write here. so i write other stuff. screwdriver - why? i think because it's a tool. that's it. it's not a clear murder, no culpability in the 1st degree. it's like a nervous breakdown, a dead blind habit, a tool, the idle form of civilization mixed with things that don't have ONE thing to do with civilization. it's no knife, it's no gun, it's no poison, it's a bloody, raw, unsophisticated effing screwdriver. hypocrit: look it up, see 8) or just look it up in the internet, etymology hypocrit (same goes for diane selwyn (md)). ever watched takeshi kitano - zatoichi? i guess it's not that related, no direct link, but i somehow was a bit astonished when i compared the ending of zatoichi with the ending of inland empire. is there, btw, an interview online anywhere (no, it isn't)? david lynch meets takeshi kitano? would love to see that. and nine inch nails - the becoming "annie / hold on a little tighter / i might / just slip away" ... i believe, though perhaps there is stuff online that states otherwise (dunno, don't have the time to look it up, don't think it's too important anyway), reznor meant annie blackburn. and then ... lh, ost, trent reznor. question mark. and, though it's a bit egocentric, but why not, if you want to know me a bit ... my mass media socialization started somehow with natural born killers and the ost. then i crawled, crawled on those lipstick traces. you're not interested in that? nice to know, no, that was a lie: i'm not intersted in you don't wanting to know that. then just look away. or download trail of dead with blood rites - that's a song for you. o - and if you want to listen to german language music, try the bundesvision song contest 2011, try to get it as a movie file from somewhere, i still watch it, i guess i will rewatch it as often as dl-films and x-men3 and dolls and mel gibson's passion. (the last sentence ... i wanted to not type it down ... i've written it yesterday, was drunk, am drunk right now (a bit), wanted to delete it ... but heck! no! ridiculousness ahead! full power!). and another remarkable laura palmer-like movie would be lilya forever, i guess, it's written 4ever, because lilya is so young and she likes silly stuff like that. and the thing with 3x denial (of jc) is standing in direct relation to the 3 things with the devil in the desert (temptations). [mogwai - death rays (i have named it "hanni und nanni: erinnerung an den reiterhof (sommerferien)] because basically assholes can come out of 3 directions. and they try to swing with them, to be down with them or so, with those assholes. and then they fall, they have the wrong ideas of those 3 guys all over their place. but there is a light shining so bright when he is there - it is totally clear that his accusers have no right and are as blind as a mole. [silly] beatles - taxman. huh! [/silly] (and i am really typing that down here, i'm really posting that shit!? well, why not...) and coldplay - viva la vida. i always think of ben horne when i see that vid. he even has that red stripe from the girl's school's bathroom on his uniform (that "dreaming of life of mystery and intrigue" / "why don't you just grow wings and join the circus?"-donna/audrey-scene). and i could also share my names for my children: it's barbara zaezilie schwanhilde (dumb, blind girl that fights like a swan) and paul noah hadubrant (paul and noah mean the same "silence, rest, standing still, peacefully", with both together it also has a child-like aspect, like saying things just for fun, like stammering with intent, jokingly and then, crowning the name, comes hadubrant "sword of hate / war, that causes burning wounds". now that was fun reading that, wasn't it? (i'm really posting this here? seems so. 3 days. i won't ever read it again. perhaps in one year. whatever.)
6) waldo the bird is laura's brother. it's the male version of laura and of course it's dl's way to render (no i can't write that out). [codeine - gravel bed] i didn't know that when i chose my username, i chose it because i like birds (i really do, am quite infatuated) and because of horus being a bird. waldo is living in the palmer's house, only thing changed: sex. it's no daughter, it's a son. that's it. sheryl lee said "was imitating a bird". no, you dubbed a bird saying laura palmer's essence with a voice totally resembling laura palmer's. [isabella rosselini - blue velvet] 7) it's about the vid. thought about: the gf (director) loves singer, but also knows that he can't live in this world and that a relationship with him can't be unless he's able to live. [helmet - in the meantime] so she tries to evoke such a state (where he could live) by forcing everyone to be like the singer (and gets lost in that?, blind habit?). but her means are imperfect and it fails and the singer doesn't understand what she's doing. well, and they talk, but no one understands no one. singer doesn't understand that gf loves him, gf doesn't understand that singer is right with "what you do won't get you anywhere". yes, i know that they are actors and that they are artists. have understood that, no need to tell me. 8) comprehensive dictionary of the english language. just because of the history of the words, not because of the explanations. try to take a look at it. it's quite worth it, all the more if etymology is a word you don't know. it's well worth the price of 20 paperback-novels. 9) fire walk with me: the good thing would be: fire do with me as you please. fwwm means sth like: i will use you for my own ends. fire is empathy, in the end working on self-extinction, nirvana. but with fwwm - nirvana will never come. 10) 11/10/31 - i will see mogwai live, for the 3rd time. hoping to meet my gf there. so what? so i write it down here, hope it finds its way to her that way. i guess it will be a quite disappointing night. sigh and good grief! yeah! i don't know another way to get in contact with her, more or less, approximately. 11) gotta watch takeshi kitano - getting any? now, that was ridiculous. expect me to come back in 2 or 3 months when this post is at page 3 or whatever. or when i feel like opening up threads i haven't written myself.
and: booth and osf and myowl are excluded from posting in this thread.
phantom / ghost : open book in a dead language, a blush, far from the madding crown, willow
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it's very silly, like twitter, like casual remarks you perhaps don't want to write openly, publicly. pff! but now it's done. i won't change it. though i clearly know that many if not all readers will blush, being ashamed of themselves because they read silly stuff like that. yeah, 5 minutes of my miserable life and because of whatever reason i chose, more or less consciously, to perennate them, to turn them into some kind of online-eternity. well, i'm drunk right now, do i have to underline that? 3 months or so. then i come back. i can do better. whatever. now i really have to quit typing, do i? ok: one last time: i know that some things i posted are quite silly and ridiculous. have pointed that out before, point it out now. i'll get over it. hope to see you on the other side. o now that's ridiculous once again - no, i have a broader plan mapped out - no, you haven't - yes, i have - no, you haven't - yes, i have. whatever: 
